Discworld 20 - Hogfather by Pratchett Terry

Author:Pratchett, Terry [Terry, Pratchett,]
Format: epub, mobi, azw3
Publisher: Acrobat Distiller 7.0.5 (Windows)
Published: 2010-06-21T04:00:00+00:00

'Yes, but what about the Eater of Socks?' said the Chair of Indefinite Studies. 'Bursar just said he always thought something was eating his socks and, bingo, there it was.' 'But we all believed him, didn't we? I know I did. Seems like the best possible explanation for all the socks I've lost over the years. I mean, if they'd just fallen down the back of the drawer or something there'd be a mountain of the things by now.' 'I know what you mean,' said Ponder. 'It's like pencils. I must have bought hundreds of pencils over the years, but how many have I ever actually worn down to the stub? Even I've caught myself thinking that something's creeping up and eating them---' There was a faint glingleglingle noise. He froze. 'What was that?' he said. 'Should I look round? Will I see something horrible?' 'Looks like a very puzzled bird,' said Ridcully. 'With a very odd-shaped beak,' said the Lecturer in Recent Runes. 'I wish I knew who's making that bloody tinkling noise,' said the Archchancellor. The oh god listened attentively. Susan was amazed. He didn't seem to disbelieve anything. She'd never been able to talk like this before, and said so. 'I think that's because I haven't got any preconceived ideas,' said the oh god. 'It comes of not having been conceived, probably.' 'Well, that's how it is, anyway,' said Susan. 'Obviously I haven't inherited . . . physical characteristics. I suppose I just look at the world in a certain way.' 'What way?' 'It ... doesn't always present barriers. Like this, for example.' She dosed her eyes. She felt better if she didn't see what she was doing. Part of her would keep on insisting it was impossible. All she felt was a faintly cold, prickling sensation. 'What did I just do?' she said, her eyes still shut. 'Er . . . you waved your hand through the table,' said the oh god. 'You see?' 'Um ... I assume that most humans can't do that?' 'No!" 'You don't have to shout. I'm not very experienced about humans, am l? Apart from around the point the sun shines through the gap in the curtains. And then they're mainly wishing that the ground would open up and swallow them. I mean the humans, not the curtains.' Susan leaned back in her chair - and knew that a tiny part of her brain was saying, yes, there is a chair here, it's a real thing, you can sit on it. 'There's other things,' she said. 'I can remember things. Things that haven't happened yet.' 'Isn't that useful?' 'No! Because I never know what they - look, it's like looking at the future through a keyhole. You see bits of things but you never really know what they mean until you arrive where they are and see where the bit fits in.' 'That could be a problem,' said the oh god politely. 'Believe me. Its the waiting that's the worst part. You keep watching out for one of the bits to go past.

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